Vampires are often misunderstood. A lot of people think that they are mythological beings that go around sucking the blood out of people…but see, people have gotten it wrong for all of these years. You see, real vampires sparkle. They also get a kick out of stalking and romancing seventeen year old girls, despite being well over a hundred themselves. I guess pedophile laws in the state of Washington don’t cover vampires…*shrug*…someone may want to write a letter to their local congressman.